26 June 2013

Giving Up

I've tried for weeks, now, everything I can think of, and I just can't do it. I can't. I cannot be a functional human being in this heat. I give up.

We are in our third solid week of 80-95 degree days (at least--my brain has melted and I can't count anymore), in a city where no one has air conditioning because Alaska is supposed to make air conditioning unnecessary. I keep all of the shades closed to block out the sun, run the fan in whichever room we are sprawled on the floor, keep everyone drinking ice water, try not to make the child wear a shirt unless we have to go to town... We stay indoors as much as possible, making one brief daily trip through the sprinkler to the mailbox and back, and the water doesn't even have the decency to be cold. Little Bear cries and cries because he's so sweaty and uncomfortable, and I can't make it better by holding him because that makes both of us even warmer. I'm not cooking, not baking; everything is thrown in the crock pot or on the grill, or just eaten straight out of the freezer. And still the temperature rises... None of us have slept well in weeks, because it is so hot and sticky. I cannot think of anything else to do to make the apartment a live-able temperature... Should I start "decorating" with bowls of ice all over the place? Keep the freezer door open 24/7 (and ignore the electric bill)?

I don't even know what "giving up" means in this situation... but it can't stay like this, it just can't. I need to have enough sanity left to take care of Little Bear and the house while dealing with the pain from having all four wisdom teeth removed on Friday morning, and if I can't even function now, what will happen then?

1 comment:

  1. Putting a bowl of ice in front of a fan should help. I'm sure you knew this, and that this is way delayed and you may not need it.